Post written by retired family law solicitor advocate.

I originally wrote this post on 1 August 2006.

I have nothing to add.

The advice still holds true.

Made me smile...

I hope it makes you feel good too.

https://divorcesolicitor.blogspot.com/2006/08/divorce-separation.html

TYPICAL QUESTIONS ON DIVORCE.

SHOULD I DATE WHEN TRYING TO GET A DIVORCE?

Post written by retired family law solicitor advocate

If they didn't they wouldn't keep doing it...

Right?

Some move on to the next victim...

But... some perfect the art of tilting the balance in their favour.

What does this mean?

Why do liars get away with it?

Your need to be with them exceeds your need for an autonomous, happy, meaningful life.

What does that mean?

The pain of leaving exceeds the pain of staying...

Hence...

Liars do get away with it in many instances.

Do people believe politicians?

Here's a post I wrote on 27 July 2007...

it drew a lot of negative comments...

from men!

This was not a condemnation of the whole male population... but estimates now say that 35% of men on dating sites such as Bumble are already in a relationship.

That's a lot.

Over a third of men on dating sites are lying to you about their relationship status... apart from the few who openly admit it of course.

Since writing this post in 2007 I have uncovered a few more clues:…

I originally wrote this post on 22 October 2006.

The advice remains the same...

Best not to.

A large number of people who leave their spouse for another...

End up breaking up with the new partner before the divorce is finalised.

Then guess what men do?

Ask their wife to take them back.

Usually the wife responds with a resounding no and the divorce is considerably more acrimonious.

The pros of dating during divorce.

It's exciting.

It's fun.

It's an escape from the misery of the broken relationship.

It staves off lonliness.

Post written by a retired family law solicitor advocate.

The emotional divorce is real.

Sometimes it hurts more than the money.

Because money is numbers.
But this is identity.

One day you’re functioning.
Next day you’re not sure who you are without them.

If you wanted the divorce, you can still grieve.
You lose the future you imagined.
The routines.
The “we”.
The sense of belonging that comes with being a couple.

If you didn’t want it, it can feel like you’ve been pushed off a cliff.
And the worst part is often this...

Your ex looks fine.

Not because it didn’t matter.
But because they left emotionally months or years ago.
They processed the ending while you were still trying to fix it.

So you’re living two different timelines.

That gap is brutal.

Rejection is part of the pain

Rejection doesn’t just sting.
It can make you question your value, your attractiveness, your judgement, your whole past.

If you’re not used to being rejected, it hits harder.
Because you think it means something final.

It usually doesn’t.

It means one relationship ended.
Not your life.

• 1. Communication Problems:

  • Lack of open and honest communication: Couples who struggle to communicate their needs, feelings, and concerns effectively often experience growing resentment and misunderstandings.

  • Poor conflict resolution skills: Inability to manage disagreements constructively can lead to escalating arguments and emotional distance.

  • Communication styles: Differences in communication styles (e.g., one partner being more expressive while the other is more reserved) can create barriers to understanding.

  2. Infidelity:

  • Breach of trust: Extramarital affairs can severely damage trust and intimacy within a marriage, often leading to irreparable harm.

The emotional divorce is as real as the financial one.

And it can hit far worse.

Suddenly your life is out of control.

You are thrown off track.

If you are the one who wanted the divorce...

You still have to cope with loss...

Loss of your dreams...

Loss of your previous life...

Loss of your place in society.

Self-Care During Divorce: It’s Not a Luxury... It’s Survival

Divorce is one of the most stressful things you’ll ever face.

The legal process is draining.

The emotional fallout is worse.

If you don’t take care of yourself, everything else suffers...

your health,

your decisions,

your future.

Here’s what real self-care looks like during a divorce.

Do their reasons differ from men?

Surprisingly they do.

While cheating is wrong regardless of gender, understanding the reasons behind it can be valuable for addressing relationship problems. Here are 5 common reasons why women cheat:

1. Emotional Dissatisfaction

• Lack of emotional intimacy: This is frequently cited as a primary reason. Women may seek emotional connection and support outside the relationship if they feel unheard, unappreciated, or emotionally neglected by their partner.

• Feeling disconnected: A lack of emotional intimacy can lead to feelings of loneliness and a desire for someone who understands and connects with them on a deeper level.

While cheating is never justified, understanding the underlying reasons why it happens can be helpful in addressing relationship issues. Here are 5 common reasons men cheat:

1. Lack of Emotional Intimacy:

• Feeling disconnected: Men may seek emotional connection and validation outside the relationship if they feel their emotional needs are not being met at home. This can involve feeling unheard, unappreciated, or lacking a sense of closeness with their partner.

• Difficulty expressing emotions: Some men may struggle to express their emotions openly, leading to a sense of isolation and a search for someone who understands them on a deeper level.

When is divorce a good thing?

There are many reasons.

Personal Growth

How so?

Maybe you've been stuck in a rut for years.

Maybe you've been stuck in a stagnant, comfort zone of misery.

Maybe you lost yourself in the sadness of an unhealthy existence.

Divorce can force you to re-evaluate.

To take stock of your life.

Change.

Improve.

Maybe even and here's the buzz phrase of the day...

Glow up.

It may help you to get to know yourself.

Understand who you are.

Embrace your faults.

Accept them at least and embrace your assets.

And you may even dive into a sense of self-awareness you never knew was possible.

Why Women Cheat...

It’s Not What You Think

Most men assume women cheat because they’re “crazy” or irrational. That’s often the word they use.

She’s emotional.

She’s moody.

She changes her mind.

She flips from warm to cold overnight.

But calling her crazy isn’t an explanation.

It’s a reaction.

What’s really going on is deeper,

and if you don’t understand it,

you risk losing your relationship without even seeing it coming.

Women Cheat Because of Feelings, Not Logic

Men tend to use logic to assess situations.

They think in systems,

patterns,

processes.

So when their partner’s behaviour doesn’t follow that logic...

when she starts arguments,

withdraws affection,

or becomes distant...

Deciding whether or not to get a divorce is a deeply personal decision that requires careful consideration. There is no universal answer as to when it is the "right" time, as every relationship and situation is unique. However, here are some factors to consider:

Consider the seriousness of the problems

• Abuse: If there is any form of abuse (physical, emotional, verbal, or financial), it is crucial to prioritise your safety and well-being. In such cases, seeking help and considering separation or divorce is important.

The Surprising Truth Behind This All-Too-Common Betrayal

When we think of cheating, we often imagine a secretive affair with someone new...

a stranger who tempts someone out of their committed relationship.

But in many cases, the truth is far more familiar and, in some ways, more painful...

men often cheat with their ex...

Why?

The reasons may not be romantic, but they are rooted in accessibility, emotional familiarity, and convenience.

Let’s break it down.